People are bored! That's what it is! Adult webmasters work their asses off to come up with something unique, something that the smut world has never seen before, only to get their cut of the market. On the other hand, smut consumers turn this situation to their advantage, always asking for more and more. This is exactly why someone came up with the idea to launch czechharem.com. Which person in his right mind would link Czech and harem!? I don't know about you, but the first thing that crossed my mind when someone says Czech is an amateur chick blowing a dick in a park for two bucks.
Call me rude, call me judgmental, but that's what it is. Obviously, people are not pleased with one cock and one pussy only. Nowadays, horny fuckers want to see men surrounded by women, cock-hungry women who would do anything for two minutes of fame. However, I decided to embrace the idea of European chicks and the concept of a harem. I am just gonna go with the flow and tell you what this place is all about. Andale!
I'm happy with the design, more or less
These people decided not to deal with logos and shit. Just put those goddamn letters, make them big and bold, and call it a day. Not too annoying. Right from the start, I am sensing that czechharem.com is one of those scarce tour pages because the only two options in the main menu are All Sites, and Log in. No About us, videos, pornstars, none of that shit. Keeping it simple!
The black background looks fine, the site is free of any ads, and the contrast of the black background and orange/red as the highlight color looks ok. I am not over the moon happy, but I guess that the best adjective to describe czechharem.com in terms of design is decent. Do you want people to call your site decent? Certainly not my style, but this section could have been way worse. I tend to find excuses for stuff like lack of diversity and amateur models, but I think that that initial vibe of the site is what differentiates a mediocre and a great website.
The site is a part of an adult network
I wanted to save this for later, but the pop-up window just won't let me live! Ok, ok, I get it! Czechharem.com is one of the Czech Authentic Videos network, meaning that you can relax and continue reading this review without a single worry in your little head. Whatever happens, you'll get loads of smut, but it comes at a price. Czechharem.com is a premium website offering exclusive videos, and I am gonna reveal the prices a tad later.
For now, I want to focus on the thumbnails. The best part of the website in terms of the design! The thumbnails show a short video preview and have an HD or 4K sign on top of them. The models don't look familiar, which makes czechharem.com one of those websites that mix the element of amateur with superb camera work. I dig the idea. I mean, having one dude surrounded by newbie chicks always brings that cheapish vibe, but I guess you could look at the harem thing as a fetish.
I want to watch the trailer! Thank God! At least something that mere mortals get to watch on czechharem.com for free. Before I clicked play, I took a look around and found out that czechharem.com does offer filtering tools in the form of tags and that all paying members get to stream and download all videos. Once they are done choosing the plan and making the payment, of course.
Aha, the trailer!
Czechharem.com likes to call it harem business, but the trailer gives out the vibe of dormitory banging. You know, the chicks that rub their pussies as their BFF gets rammed, waiting for their turn. All vixens are in their early or mid-twenties, and the guys are...I don't know, they're just dudes. Who the hell cares? The bitches get pounded, knead each other's boobs along the way, and flock around the prick to welcome a stream of jizz on their cute, young faces. The content is hardcore, and the camera work is fine. It looks ok, but that's as far as I would go with the adjectives. I am still waiting for that wow factor that seems to elude me!
It looks like the collection of porn on czechharem.com is under 100, which is not a big deal since the site is a part of a big network. Unfortunately, I am not able to tell you anything about the uploads because czechharem.com chose not to reveal that info. You know what? I don't give a fuck! If a page that expects people to go premium decided to keep such info a secret, there's probably a good reason for that. In any case, you'll get to enjoy frequent updates.
The question is, what would happen if czechharem.com was a stand-alone site? Does it have what it takes to meet anyone's needs? The number of videos is not enough, the models are not famous, and the page design is not particularly attractive. Ok, the harem fetish is kinda unique, I'll give you that, but generally speaking, there's nothing spectacular about this place. Do you know what will make you feel better? Some bonus content chat! Here we go!
29 sites for the price of one membership plan
Yeah, now you're talking! That's me encouraging myself to keep going and turn this boring review into something worthwhile! Here comes the list of the Czech Authentic Videos websites that caught my attention - Czech Sauna, Czech Lesbians, Czech Pawnshop, Czech Supermodels, Czech Solarium...29 sites in total. That's loads of bonus content. A whole network is at your disposal where you'll get not only to stream but download videos as well. Of course, the tour page decided not to mention galleries, which doesn't necessarily mean they don't exist on the page. It's just yet another secret of czechharem.com that annoys the shit out of me.
The network promises over 39,306 minutes of videos. What kind of a number is that!? What happened with showing the number of videos? No, these Czech guys come up with weird shit like showing cameras in solarium beds and showing some freakin' minutes instead of the real deal. The network claims to bring regular updates and up to 4K videos. Another annoying thing. Anything can be up to 4K. 420p is up to 4K, right?! The only thing that's straightforward on czechharem.com is the info revealing that all sites are optimized for all devices.
$1.00/day for a monthly membership plan. In simple words, that's $29.95 billed in one payment. $0.72/day for 90 days of access (billed in one payment of $64.95) and $0.56/day for 180 days which is exactly $99.95 when billed in one payment. You can use Visa or your credit card to make the payment, but you'll have to sign-up first by entering data like username and email. Pretty simple when you give it some thought. It's just that czechharem.com wants to turn a simple thing into rocket science for some fucked-up reason.
A couple of wise thoughts for the end
The Czech chicks you'll see in here are not professional hoes. They look like models, they are young (18+) and fit, but I haven't seen a single milf anywhere on czechharem.com. I am sure that you're gonna dig up one of two milfs. All you have to do is watch 39,603+ minutes of videos. All joking aside, and I was pretty damn harsh with czechharem.com, this is a good place to spend your money on, if you are into European porn.
I don't stumble upon these kinds of networks every day. Finding a whole network where all videos are of great picture quality is a tough job. Well, I nailed it once again! The bonus content is the best part, but czechharem.com is not shabby either. Take a look at that trailer! Pretty soon, you are gonna find out that not so many things in this world are as hot as a queue of naked chicks on their tip-toes, waiting for their turn to take a cock for a ride. Harem! Sounds like a hell of a fantasy! Give it a go, fuckers!